With both of my hands grasped tightly around the rusty metal rail, I gazed down upon the rocks scattered far across the coastline and the waves that engulfed them. A small island floated in the distance. The sun’s light caused the ocean to sparkle with the confidence I lacked. I was filled with mixed emotions—astonishment at the view and anxiety about potential danger that awaited me. The danger in question? A climb to reach Jeongbang Waterfall (정장폭포), located in the south part of Jeju (제주), a popular island of South Korea.  

After my friends snapped several Instagram-worthy photos they turned away from the overlook and started down the dreaded path. I followed carefully behind and gripped my bag for stability. As we trudged down the dirt path, I braced myself for what was to come and began feeding myself words of encouragement.  

Ava, you’ll survive! Surely it won’t be that bad. The experience and pictures will be worth it! Plus, you’ll have a cool story to tell.  

In the midst of my inner dialogue, we reached the bottom of the trail. Instantly the atmosphere felt different. The once small group of rocks were larger than life. The waterfall cascaded at an overwhelming speed behind groups of tourists. The reality of the climb took over. Whatever “confidence” I seemingly built in the last few minutes tumbled down. I watched as my seemingly fearless friends stepped off solid ground and onto the dispersed terrain. Ironically, several signs with the words “Do not climb on rocks, slippery!” were posted across the landscape.  

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall; Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.  

I pictured myself as a Humpty Dumpty Jeju version who slips on rocks instead of a wall. A broken Ava egg. As I stood still, contemplating every path to injury, my friend Victoria called out to me to, “Ava, just go!” And so, I snapped out of my contemplative state and proceeded to walk over. Like a game of the floor is lava, I slowly but surely considered step after step.  

One foot in front of the other. Great, you’re doing it! Not too far now… 

And then, the inevitable happened. My foot slipped on a wet rock, causing my sunglasses to fall off my head. The great shift in weight caused my bag to topple to one side. I desperately tried to regain my balance and after quite a bit of squirming I regained my stance. However, this slip-up caused a profound sense of self-doubt. I wouldn’t dare take another step. I looked deep down into the abyss between the rocks. Scared I would fall again, I stood still like the rocks below me and closed my eyes.  

Should I turn back? What was I thinking? I can’t do this. Why did I think I could do it? 

My mind was going a mile a minute, as fast as the cascading waterfall.  

Why couldn’t I be more like my friends? More fearless. Why did this one error cause me to freeze up completely? No Ava, pull yourself together. You can do it.  

Finally, I opened my eyes. I could do this. After several minutes of mental tennis, I continued across the path, eyes ablaze. In an instant I made it. I saw the glistening waterfall, the multicolored rocks, and my friends stood in front, as small as ants, gazing up in awe. I listened carefully. I heard the running water, the chatter of excited tourists, the rush of ocean waves, and the rippling wind. I smelled the sea salt of the ocean, the seaweed pasted on the rocky path, and the sweet smell of sunscreen on my skin. I felt the speckles of water shoot out from the waterfall’s impact, the sun’s warmth beam down on my head, and the pure joy of the moment and my achievement. Everything was utterly beautiful. Despite my doubts and fears, I did it. Carpe diem, I seized the moment.